When I think of Micaiah's birthday, I will always also be reminded of Hosanna
and this precious gift of life.
I do not believe in coincidences.
I know that life is full of divine providence.
For me, October 24th just happens to be one of them.
In June of 2008 during the fourth month of my third pregnancy, I was diagnosed with a rare genetic blood disorder called
anticardiolipin Igm (click for more info). Not only had our family experienced the loss of a child (Hosanna at 8 months on Oct 24, 2007) and now we are faced with the uncertainty of future child bearing. This genetic blood disorder is an autoimmune deficiency that has no cure and does not necessarily show symptoms. It causes blood clots and elevated levels of antibodies that will fight and destroy healthy tissue. I was at ease to finally know the reason for the stillbirth of my son and for the blood clot in his brain that had caused his demise. Yet I was worried about how the current pregnancy was going to go. Such mixed emotions ran through the course of this third pregnancy. When my midwife found out the results of the test, I had to find a perintologist. The first thing I asked was, "what is a perintologist?" These are specialists who focus on high risk pregnancy. After enjoying the first pregnancy, I never thought I'd be at a high risk for failure to carry out a pregnancy.
At KU Med, I was put on a daily injection of blood thinner, baby aspirin, and folic acid. It was so awkward to give myself shots every morning. I just kept reminding myself that this is for the health of the baby and myself. What the doctors kept finding was that the blood pressure going into the womb was very high. This is where the blood clotting issue was given weekly attention and concern. I am so thankful for the medical care and attention that helped me get through this pregnancy. It seems as though this blood disorder may only affect me while I'm pregnant, with the chance of causing miscarriage, premature labor, heart attacks, and other possible complications. Weekly visits to the doctor were hard on Anna and I, especially as the pregnancy progressed and I was fatigued.
Every weekly visit consisted of a blood pressure check, weight check,
growth check, sonogram, and 3-D video scan.
November 24th -- was the due date we were told. A Thanksgiving baby would be a wonderful thing to be thankful for! After getting to the 8th month, I found myself becoming more at peace in the expectation of the health and survival of baby boy Rich.
This little boy would show us his fight for life and be a reminder to us of the Lord's redemption at work in our family's lives. On October 24th (4 weeks early, on the same day one year after we found out the sad news about Hosanna), came the unexpected early arrival of Micaiah. I woke up that morning with heavy bleeding and headed straight for the ER. I was sent to the maternity triage. After a brief exam and an internal sonogram, the doctor told me that everything looked good but that I was in labor. I didn't know it yet, but the laboring pains were just beginning. This was scary to me because of the lack of growth that would be missed in the last month. I was reassured by the doctors when they explained that all the sonograms had showed good development of his lungs, yet I knew he was going to be a small baby. While laboring in the evening, the doctors became concerned when the baby's heart rate began to fluctuate and decrease, so they prepared me for an emergency c-section. I really wanted to do a natural birth, so I asked to have the anesthesia given to me at the very last moments. The doctors agreed to give me an epideral in the operating room. This would also allow Brian to be present during the delivery. As I was wheeled in to the operating room, I could see Brian's nervous look in his eyes as he was dressed in sterile surgery garb. As I sat up on the operating table prepping for the epidural, I sensed a familiar urge to push. It was time!!! I was complete and fully dilated. Since I had not been given the epidural yet, everything was stopped. As soon as I laid down, I distinctly remember the doctor telling me that I had to wait to push. I was ready and those were the longest seconds of the day! At 10:39pm, he came out blue with a cord wrapped around his neck twice and making no sounds. They unraveled the cord, cut the umbilical cord, and he finally let out a loud cry. WHEW!!!
From the very beginning of his life in this world, he has been a fighter.
I was so relieved that I didn't have the epidural because it was so wonderful to be able to walk to the NICU immediately after his birth to visit him in his "little house." He was incubated for five days and had to do phototherapy in a special light blanket for jaundice.
We brought him home a week later and marveled at how precious the gift of life is.
October 24th is a day that I will never forget.
From struggles of grief and surrender, to tears of joy and thankfulness.
My hope is in the Lord, and in Him I entrust all the days of my life.
And the lives of my husband and children,
no matter how short or how long their life may be.
He's got the whole world in His hands!
Anna means, "full of grace."
Hosanna means "save, we pray!" (an exclamation of praise)
Micaiah means "who is like the Lord?"
There is one thing that gives me peace and comfort through the turmoil, the struggles, and the great joy that I've experienced in this life...
...it is the unchanging love of Jesus Christ that has and is changing me and how I live my life.
I am so grateful to put my faith and trust in the Lord our God who gives and takes away,
yet my heart will choose to say, "Blessed be the name of the Lord."
